If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it
Don't be mad once you see that he want it
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it.
First things first: my disclaimer.
I admit that it's got a great beat and an awesome dance. And naturally that's going to be what people say to me after this post, as a justification for listening to this song and singing along. So there, I said it. It's catchy.
I admit that it's got a great beat and an awesome dance. And naturally that's going to be what people say to me after this post, as a justification for listening to this song and singing along. So there, I said it. It's catchy.
However, if you're in a room with any number of girls> 1 and this song comes on, there becomes this tangible aura of "girl power." Why is that? It's not because of the beat. It's not because of the dance. It's because of the lyrics. Beyonce (who has already thrown away my respect as a person: see lyrics of Survivor versus lyrics of Naughty Girl) is proclaiming that ohhh, "I'm so fine that you better marry me if you wanna keep another guy from snatching me up." I mean in essence, this is what she's saying. Even though that's a pretty arrogant thing to say, that's not where my dispute lies.
Ladies...
I need you to be realistic with me for just a moment. Please reflect on this long enough to consider your actual response, and do not just brush it off as an exaggerated scenario with all these "well it depends" excuses. That's all bullcrap. Imagine for a few minutes if this actually happened to you: you're dancing in the club with some guy you just started dating/seeing/whatevering and the fool actually drops to a knee, whips out a ring, and proposes to you? I mean he's just doing as the song commands, is he not? That's sweet, isn't it? I mean I'm sure that every single lady in the joint would be very excited to suddenly be not single, right? NO! You would freak the heck out! Unless you've been dating this dude seriously (aka you're in a relationship, aka you're not single so this song doesn't even apply to you so why do you sing it with such self-empowered feminism?), you will scream OMG CREEPER and run off, avoiding the boy every day for the rest of your life.
So it's just ironic to me to hear girls sing this song with so much authority. If you're single because you like being single, then don't sing a song about how a man better commit if he wants to keep you around. If you're single because you're waiting for Mr. Right, don't sing a song with the misguided message that any guy that wants to keep you better give you a ring, and quick! But if you're single against your will, by all means sing this song with all your heart. Just don't slap the guy that jumps the gun on a proposal.
I will make an exception for my usual "do not respond to comments" policy and debate freely, if public comments are made that justify it. :-)
Disclaimer edit: This blog addresses the message that the chorus presents. Taken in context with the verses, the message is for women in long-term relationships with guys that won't commit to forever. Which is a pretty good message. But my aim is to shut up the ridiculousness of the many girls who ignore the verses and only get excited over the chorus.
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9 comments:
Sloooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
"Cried my tears for 3 good years, ya can't be mad at me."..."
Your love is what I prefer, what I deserve...say I'm the one you want, if you don't you'll be alone, and like a ghost, I'll be gone"
I hate to tell ya Daniel, but the average guy, particularyly in Beyonce's world does not look for commitment, but rather for someone to come to when he needs her. You said so in a previous blog. The song shows that she's devoted 3 years to this guy, and he's still treating her like she's just a random fling! So, in the song, she's saying she's fed up with a guy that just trys to buy her stuff, then do his own thing. She just told the guy, Next!, but now that she's not around, he's vulnerable...Oh no, she's not there anymore! Too bad :)
And soo many women make the mistake as to put up with this kind of behavior from their guy. She tells us, you don't have to. If he's not committed to you, then go find someone else who is! You as a woman can do better! The single ladies part of the song is showing that "you did what she just did...no longer put up with a wishywashy guy"
I'm not a huge fan of the song, or Beyonce as an artist; she has morphed into the stereotyped pop queen, not the lady that had her heart in the right place, but I do understand the song :)
hahahah. oh daniel...that's hardly the point of the song at all. it's not saying we expect you to propose as soon as you decide you "like it," just that after BEING in a long term relationship and NEVER proposing, it's time to move on and you can't get mad about it. it's a simple concept really. same thing as saying "ya snooze ya lose" and i am in 100% agreement with that phrase and with the lyrics of this song so BOO YAH. hahah. honestly, i wish more girls had the confidence to actually live by those words instead of just singing them.
ANYWAY, that's my two cents :)
I'm impressed that you girls know more of the words than just the chorus, and have taken the time to actually apply it to the takeaway message.
And as such, I'm in full agreement. If you've been in a relationship for 2+ years and you're ready to take THE STEP but the guy lacks the balls to do it, good for you for taking pride in this song.
But how many girls out there are in this situation? The un-engaged long-term relationships I know of are all mutually agreed upon situations where the girl is not pressing the issue. However, even if she does press the issue, instead of taking this song's message to heart, she usually clings to the guy and cries about her situation. Rarely does she actually leave him and say "too bad, you had your chance."
that's exactly what i'm saying! haha. so you admit the message is actually a good one :)
Let's understand what I'm admitting. The actual message is a good one, but 95% of the girls that sing it are not in the situation she portrays (long-term relationship w/ a guy that won't commit to forever). Therefore them going all "feminastic" over this song is a hallucinated misrepresentation of their romantic outlook on life.
ps I totally made up the word "feminastic".
Further, most girls also don't care about singing the verses where the GOOD message takes place. They only belt the chorus, which, when taken out of the context of the verses, is a completely different and very very unrealistic message. That's the message this blog entry is addressing. lol fun fun fun
Feminastic is my new favorite word.
Let me just say that I have utterly enjoyed reading all of these comments! It just so happens that I have this song on my mp3 player, and yes, I have listened to the verses and understand the message, which I agree is a good one for girls who have or are being abused emotionally in a relationship. However, why does a girl have to be in the same situation that the character in a song is in in order to appreciate the message of the song? Even though we aren't all in the situation, we can all understand the situation and we can all draw encuragement from such a message.
I can also believe that most of the girls singing this song do only sing the chorus. But like you said, it's catchy. It's certainly the first part of the song that I learned, so I don't see it as rediculus that girls only sing the chorus- it's fun.
Thirdly,yes, some women are weak and don't believe that they can make it in the world on there own, and therefore cling to a man- any man, even one that won't commit to a mature relationship. But may I say that if that woman knew the King of Kings and that she is beautifully and wonderfully made, she would have no doubts about how strong she can be in the world and would never let a man use her in such a way. I know that the song in question says nothing about such things, but it is about the strength of a woman, and the Lord is where I get my own strength.
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